The Return of Gordon Ramsey
by ephermaltoaster
Summary: All Natural no filter #nohate


Once apon a time...

On the day her apartment was dominated with dominating force, Saras son had been sleeping untill 11 am.  
>Normaly he got up at 5 to see the dawn break over the vaste beautiful world, because Sara had raised him as a good boyafter his mother died in mysterious circumstances all those years ago.<p>

Everyone else was already up.

Andromielle, Sara's son, was already making them all crumpets with sirup. Andromielle was an best in her class atballet, his parents were proud. He was going to a school for gifted and thats all that mattered to them.  
>They didnt mind that he was a bit wild at times. Sometimes coming back with blood on 11, he now knew shitloads of languages, two ancient, 2 computer and 6 sign languages.<br>He found it easy, and learnt them with his dad together.

By now, Sara was now up and standing on the porch with her shirt off. She stared out over the wide desert landscape, she was handsome in a rugged kinda way.  
>Once, long ago, she was ranked one of the best special forces soldiers in the world. She was no longer a soldier, and now lived a quite life treasure hunting.<br>She was troubled by a newspaper artical her read a few days ago, that mentioned that someone from Shitsville was killed in a drive by shooting . Her was one of the few people that knew that that shouldnt happen, because of a magic spell she cast with Booty a few years ago.  
>The Booty was now hidden in his garrage.<br>Sara was disturbed from her deep thinking by Andromielle tugging on her shirt.  
>"Father! Father! Look!".<br>Andromielle pointed urgently at the horizon.  
>"Frell!"<br>Para-troopers Hundreds of them!  
>They were coming straight at her house.<br>She ran inside and bolted the stainless steal front door.  
>She woke her son up, and told everyone to run out the back.<br>They woke their pilot, who happened to be sleeping in the next room.

"Quick! Start the Jump-Jet! We are under attack!"  
>"OMG" He said as Jawn run out.<br>He ran back in with his helmit.  
>"Holy Shit!".<br>Sara, meanwhile, triggered an explosion around his garrage in order to hide his precious Booty. The rocks fell and burried it totaly secretly so no one would find it. (None of the soliders heard the explosion as they were looking the other way)  
>Meanwhile, the invading force drew closer.<br>Sara and his family ran to the hanger, Andromielle leading the way with her katana BANG BANG!' Andromielle killed only those she had too, merely mortaly wounding the rest  
>They dodged the soldiers as they ran, ducking and diving between the gunfire. Blood splattered around them.<br>"Dont worry! We are almost there!".  
>They dived into their escape vechile, guns blazing.<br>Their was a soldier already there, but Andromielle whackd him.  
>"Good job!" Sara said, as she pushed him out.<br>They started up, and zoomed off, the invading force vanishing into the distance.  
>"Did you get the secret message?"<br>"Yes, my good friend Isaac told me that Gordon Ramsey was behind this!".  
>"We gota deal with this as a family, else we can never live in piece".<br>So they joined onwards, their enemy's in hot pursuit!

A/N I got bord of writing the fanfic as it was so I decided to change things around. I hope u guys like it!

She was as of yet the most beautifyl thingy in the whole of Shitsville, Sara believed her to be. As she faigjt the great hitler-esq Gordon Ramsey, her hair bobbed up and down consistantly like the stockmarket. She swipped at the Gordon Ramsey and was more than anything Sara had seen before. Her beatiful feistful pressure shocked Gordon Ramsey's henchmen into copulating before her.

Andromielle, take my sword! said Sara, and give it to the greatness before us. She will need our legendary sword in order to defeat the great fearsomeGordon Ramsey

And lo! Andromielle did so and the maginificent great mysterious woman took the sword and stabbed Gordon Ramsey.

He was defeated. But was Gordon Ramsey? Because as Sara ran towards the mysterious strange beauty of Her draems and was about to share the greatest kiss She had ever given to someomne in the history of mankind, Gordon Ramsey rose up and fled!  
>And this is where the story ends...<p>

It has come... to my attention... that "some" "critics"... don't like my art. They say that it's...it's all badly written and out of character (if the writer had any guts, they'd write it this way! horrible violent (this is MATURE, DID"T U READ THE DISCLAIMER?!). That hurts me a lot. Really... a lot.  
>Do u know how long it takes me to write my stories? Do u think I like it being stuck at home with nothing to do but writing my soul into my art? My favourite show just ended and I fuckjed up my last test!<p>

Writing is the only thing that makes me happy, but if that isn't good enough for u people, then I'm going to call it quits!  
>Yes, that's righr! I won't finish this story! YOU WONT EVER FIND OUT THE END! HAPPY NOW?!<p>

I want to thank PrincessDumbledore34 and Rainbowcorn for beta reading, but I... I... I... just can't take it anymore.

Goodbye crawl internet. I'll never use you AGAIN!


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